When you realize… February 26, 2012

We change, we grow, we evolve.

 

Habits go, new habits are formed.  Life’s ups and downs leaves scars and moments of triumph.

 

One thing is for certain: the person you are today, you hope that the person 10 years from now will be a better version of you.

 

Which means that pet peeves will no longer be pet peeves, which may mean you don’t get as fired up as you used to, which may mean you’ll think a little more before you react.

 

Sometimes admitting to those changes are difficult.  You can no longer brag about how lethal of a temper you have or how crazy your left hook is.  You can no longer say you’ve never been walked all over or tried to be taken advantage of.  All of these things, in our world, are perceived to be signs of strength.  “Good” characteristic traits.

 

Realizing that you let things slide more than you used to, coming off as a little more “passive” to the outside world, realizing that people are able to see past your rougher exterior and may take advantage of what’s really there–it may be a tough pill to swallow.

 

But the more you ignore the person who you are becoming, the more danger you’re putting yourself in.  What’s worse than being in a situation where you no longer recognize yourself anymore?

 

What is defined to be “weak” (being able to walk away from a potentially disastrous situation or refusing to engage in office politics) in our society are actually true signs of strength.  What is defined to be “soft” (smiling when someone tries to hurt you, giving people second chances) are actually true signs of wisdom.

 

And if we were to all true to ourselves, imagine what the world would be like…

This shit still exists February 24, 2012

I’ve been trying to write a post about “quiet” racism for weeks now.

 

Either the words don’t come to me or I’m being too careful.

 

Until finally, I managed to tweet about it.

 

I got a lot of feedback. Mostly, my fellow Twitter and Facebook friends liking the fact that I said it, or acknowledging that many people don’t think it exists.

 

I want to say: we’re not as evolved as we think we are. In fact, I think we’re still in that “savage” stage of human evolution.

 

Which means: racism does still exist.

 

Except it’s quiet.

 

Which means that if you’re working with someone who is a racist you’re going to be fighting against their stereotypes, prejudices, and limitations they’ve put on you simply because of your colour and what they believe is part of your religious belief. They’re not going to express it, but they will limit you. Especially if they’re in a position of authority. They’re keeping you around because they’ve been told they need more colour in their office and your role is simply to be that token (brown girl) in my case.

 

For those of you who are reading this and have not experienced racism: you’re lucky. It sucks.

 

When I was 8, the elementary school I went to was shared space with another school. Our fields and property were separated by a fence. We often made friends with the neighbouring school, talking, laughing, joking. Until one day, when I was minding my own business, this white kid comes out of nowhere, takes a bite out of his apple, throws it at me and calls me a Sand Nigger.

 

I was 8. I had no idea what that meant and why he did it. I am born Canadian. I have the worse memory ever but every time I recall that experience, it’s as though it happend yesterday. I also recently dealt with “quiet” racism in a professional setting.

 

To those of you who are no racist but have friends who are, I suggest the following:

 

1. Education them
2. Leave ‘em

 

If they’re not willing to hear you out, why keep friends like that?

 

You’re allowing their negative and baseless assumptions poison your mind. Why would you want to be around that? You’re enabling them by giving them company.

 

To those of you who are racist.

 

I’m not going to waste my energy on you. If you have pre-conceived notions about who I am, what I am able to do, and what I can (or can’t) offer, then so be it. You want me out of your space, I’ll leave, because frankly, I do not want to expend my time, energy, or resources on someone who chooses to be ignorant. That would be stupid of me to do. I will not fight you or try to change your mind since the very idea of knowledge and being knowledgeable has escaped you. I will not converse or engage you as there are plenty of reasons out there on why you shouldn’t be a racist. I’m simply going to walk away because frankly, all you deserve is my back turned towards you.

 

Don’t be a Racist. Nobody likes a Racist.

I Quit. February 16, 2012

…from my job.

 

I wasn’t happy.  I didn’t like it.  And it wasn’t what I wanted to gain experience in.  I was frustrated.

 

So I resigned.  Without having another job lined up.

 

Tomorrow is my last day.

 

As the week quickly approaches to its conclusion, I can’t help but feel lighter, happier, free …. relieved.  I all of a sudden got my dreams back of perhaps moving to another country for a little while.  Maybe trying my hand in a different industry.  Maybe changing my strategy.  Whatever the case, I’m free.

 

And I learned a very important lesson.  One that I already knew but this whole experience confirmed it:

 

Don’t make your decisions based on security, or money.  Because if those are the only reasons you’re making your decision on, it’s going to completely back-fire.

 

I encourage you.  I beg of you.  Do what you LOVE.  Do what you’re PASSIONATE about.  The money and security will follow.